tender mercies

Today is the second to last day of the month. So of course I haven't done my visiting teaching. And my companion Summer is harder to track down than a vegetarian at a hoe down, so I decided I would go on my own. Instead of baking cookies and writing a note that says, "Sorry we missed you, enjoy these cookies" I felt inspired instead to put together an elaborate cornacopia of produce and deliciousness that I acquired today at two of my favorite food suppliers: the food co-op and the Farmer's Market. (Anyone who knows me even a little knows that I love these two things very very much. And if you didn't, you do now.) So, if you'll kindly look below you will see my twin creations. I think they turned out pretty well. And yes, those are cereal boxes that they are in. Or rather, one cereal box cut in half and lined with grocery bags. I was pretty proud of myself indeed... Also included was a note slipped under the ribbon around the bread that said, "Sorry we missed you, enjoy this food" (well, not really, but kind of).

As I was on my way over to deliver said goodies, I was walking across the parking lot and I heard my name yelled from above. I look up saw that it was Celeste Cummings. Celeste used to live in Campus Plaza, but has since moved on to bigger and better things. And by that I mean she moved down the street which, by the way, puts her in a different ward and stake. Oh Provo. But there she was on the third floor of Campus Plaza yelling my name. So I said hi back and we chatted a bit from a far, then I went and dropped off my food to my girls on the south side of the building. On my way back home I decide to swing around to the north side of the building instead of just walking down the south side stairs so that I could actually talk to Celeste from a distance of less than 100 feet. Sadly, as I rounded the corner I saw her already walking away with John Taylor and another friend in tow. 

Normally, seeing that I was too late to catch her, I would have just let it go, but for some reason I hurried after them. I caught up with them at Celeste's car and she came over and gave me a hug and invited me to dinner. What? I was worried that I was intruding on a pre-planned dinner party (which I have learned in the past is never a good idea, even when invited) but when she said that it was all spur of the moment I said, "Sure!" and got in the car. My plan of saying yes was again put into action. 

So we went to Celeste's house. And made delicious tinfoil dinners which included potatoes, carrots, peas, onions, garlic, and BACON! They were so good. We grilled chicken on the side. While we waited for them to cook we played the card games Blink! and Zeus on the Loose. I liked them both a lot. And not just because I won. Celeste, John Taylor and Celeste's friend Carrie are fabulous people. They really are. They are the kind of people that you just love to be around because they are cheerful and encouraging and just nice. And that's just how they are. They aren't pretending. Celeste was always sure to include me in any conversation, explaining about people or events if I didn't know what they were talking about. I love people like that so much because I think that is just so considerate and I like feeling included.

After dinner there was talk of going to Celeste's ward activity to watch a movie in the park. At this point I almost excused myself because the movie was one I'd never heard of before (Paul's Neighbor, or something to that effect) and I was afraid it was going to be lame, but I reminded myself that I really had nothing else to do (and besides, I was having a great time) so I went. The movie ended up being Madagascar 2 (which was surprisingly good) and again, with Celeste, Carrie and John Taylor it was 10 times better. 

All in all it ended up being a great night. A fabulous night! One for the history books. Or rather, blog annuls...

Moral of the story? Always do your visiting teaching, even if you feel lame going by yourself with only food and no message. Okay, maybe that's not a great moral. What about: when people you don't really know invite you into their cars and into their homes, you should always go. That's much better.

only the strong survive

New Jersey is awesome. This is true for a plethora of reasons, a few of which I actually outlined in a short paper once about proper English usage rules ("The word 'armpit' should never be used to modify the words 'New Jersey.'"). But aside from the fact that New Jersey has the highest percentage of millionaire households (what does that even mean?) it is rich in other ways. 

Like diversity. The LDS population in the state is less than 1%, (unlike states like Utah, Idaho, Arizona,Oregon or even California) but that has its advantages. Like, you know how people talk about the church as being like their family? In New Jersey it is. Especially for my family because our actual extended family lives all the way on the other side of the country, on both sides of the border. When you only see your grandparents and cousins only once every two years they can seem more like strangers than family. But my parents always made sure that we were friends with our cousins. Why? Because they're our cousins. And family is forever. In Jersey, other church kids became our cousins—you were friends because you were Mormon and that bound you together, whether you liked it or not. We even had adopted grandparents in the ward—Sister and Patriarch Smith (Mrs. Smith was also my first grade teacher). And that family is forever, too. 

So now that I'm at BYU and I see kids I know from Jersey it is awesome. Because it's like a little family reunion every time. Even kids who haven't lived in the state since elementary school still count because we're still friends. And we always will be. Now, that doesn't mean that we hang out all the time or even have a ton in common, but because we are from New Jersey we will always have that special Jersey-family bond.

And that is why New Jersey is the best. 

Also because we invented the drive-in movie theater. And the light bulb. No big deal.

just dance, gonna be okay...

So I went to a concert thing that turned into a dance party tonight. What? I don't do things like that. Especially when I am dressed in what has been thrice called a cute teacher outfit. But I did do it. And you know what? It was fun! All part of my plan to say yes to everything. So far, so good.

time refuses to stand still

There are not enough hours in the day.

the whole world is getting married

Today Dani, my roommate in Spain, got married. I couldn't make it to the reception which is silly because it was just up in Salt Lake, but I just couldn't justify a 3-4 hour trip tonight. I'm sad because I haven't seen her since the summer and I just love her.

My favorite Dani/Nate memory is from when we were in Spain. She was chatting on Skype with Nate and talking about how she was concerned about finding housing for the fall since she was in Spain and wasn't able to look for or sign any contracts until she got home. To which he replied, "Well, we could live together..." He was clearly joking but she was caught completely off guard and didn't know what to do. She just sat there in silence, speechless, until Nate broke the silence by changing the subject. Well guess what? Now they will be living together. He tricked her good.

a tale of girl, dog, & their search for happiness

I recently read this phenomenal book called Because of Winn-Dixie by Kate DiCamillo. Fun fact: she also wrote The Tale of Desperaux. So, this is a kids' book, but it also is not a kids' book. I read it for my literature and film class and we discussed this today. It has a kind of classic kids' story line: girl who is missing one of her parents finds a stray dog, gets to keep it, then has adventures with said dog, making new friends along the way. So, that is one way to read it. And it is completely legitimate. (Side note: why are the characters of children's books so often orphans, missing one of their parents, or do not have a good relationship with them? What is it about parents that stifle children heroes? Does it have to be that way? Has anyone written a successful children's book where the child is loved by both her parents and where she loves them back? Or does that happy family situation not lend itself to conflict and thus interesting action? Just something to think about...)

So, on the surface, this is just another kids' book with a juvenile story line. But there are deeper themes of the book that children won't necessarily pick up on, at least consciously. The theme of loneliness, for example, or sorrow, or forgiveness, or heartbreak. And that is what makes this book beautiful. I am not embarrassed to admit that I cried as I read it. I am slightly embarrassed to admit that I also cried during the movie (which was not as profound). Both times I saw it.

I am currently trying to write a song about the book as my final adaption project for this class. I'm having trouble making it sound legitimate though. Right now one of the the final lines is: "Just remember your friend Winn-Dixie who loves you till the end." Yeah... this is why I'm not a songwriter. 

i am famous

This is my ward newsletter. So... basically I'm an international superstar.

...in my life i've loved them all

I came to the realization today that people are leaving. I've mostly been focused on the people I will be leaving, like Jen and Megan, Aleisha and Claire, or my aunt Taunya, people that will be left behind here in Utah, at least for a short while, while I go off to start my post-college life...wherever. But today while I was at church, wondering if there was teacher prep today, I looked around for Louis to ask him. And he wasn't there. He is in Chile on an internship and I will most likely not see him again for a very long time. Then there's Sydney who's going to Nepal on Tuesday, Chaela who will be doing EFY all summer, and Stephanie who is in Nevada working on a farm. Brad is leaving Tuesday to go to Florida to work at Disney World (or is it Disney Land? I always get those two confused...). These are people that I really care about who have become an integral part of my life in the past year and even longer. And pretty soon they won't be.

I'm not the kind of person who cries at good byes. I'm the kind of person who looks at people crying and thinks, "Really? Suck it up." But then about a week later when it sinks in that I won't be seeing those people every day or even once a month I will cry alone in my bed as I fall asleep. I'm happy to say that the crying hasn't started yet, and I predict it won't until I'm in the Poconos in Pennsylvania in a cabin full of 10-year-old girls lying exhausted and feeling alone. And that's when I will miss them most.

saturday's market, cousins, and more nuptials

This morning I went to Portland's Saturday Market and it completed me. My favorite stand was the Spoonman. I bought fork/spoon earrings and a fork ring. I loff them. 

Additionally, I got to see my cousin Treva, her husband Chad and their kids Anna and Tate! That also completed me. Especially when they told me that if I decide I want to move to Portland I am welcome to live in their soon-to-be-refinished basement while I figure things out. Very very tempting. Also they have chickens so that they can have their own free-range eggs. What? I love Portland. Also my cousins.

I took the MAX to the airport (also I love public transportation—which, by the way, I had the epiphany that airplanes are public transportation! So... all those people who think they're better than everyone else and say that they could never use public transportation most likely definitely have. So take that!) so that I could get back to Utah in time for my friend Brock's wedding reception in American Fork. Yes, the entire world is getting married. And, you guessed it, Brock and Kate are another meant-to-be couple. She is a photography major, Brock is a fabulous photographer. Kate lived in Spain for 3 years and speaks Spanish fluently, I met Brock on our study abroad to Spain and he was the fastest Spanish language learner of us all. And, most importantly, they love each other. And I love them. And hopefully they love me enough to wear the Cassi shirts that I made them...

it's a nice day for a white wedding

Today Kirsten and Brett were sealed for time and all eternity. Can you tell that they are insanely happy about that? And I am also happy. I was lucky enough to be invited up to Portland for the celebration and I had the best time. I have never been a member of a wedding party, and even though I was only a second-string bridesmaid it made everything that much more fun. 

I have only known Kirsten and Brett as a unit (when she moved into the Pink House in fall of 08 they were already dating) but their one-ness makes perfect sense to me. They are one of those couples that you see and say, "Oh yes, of course you are meant to be together" (bonus points if you can remember who else I've said that about in this blog). I am so happy for them and their new life together and I just hope that they don't forget about those of us they've left behind.

Another event of note: my friend Kait Morgan (at whose house I was able to stay for the duration of my Portland visit) got engaged today to a fabulous young man named Erik Smith (yet another couple made for each other). Love is clearly in the air.

portland

I am in Portland. And I am in love with it.

who needs sleep? no, you're never gonna get it...

I have recently given up on getting a reasonable amount of sleep every night and have accepted the fact that I will be falling asleep in at least one of my classes every day for a period of 5-10 minutes. This amount of time may increase in my literature and film class where my professor insists on turning off all the lights when we watch movies, creating the perfect Pavlovian environment for me to fall asleep in. I have no hope of ever seeing the entire film of Turn of the Screw, Because of Winn-Dixie, Shane, or Pinoccio. At least, not in class.

new hair

So after almost a year of getting my hair cut by my mom or friends I decided that it was finally time to suck it up and pay the big bucks for a professional hair cut. That's right. I went to Paul Mitchell and paid twelve big ones for this puppy. (Well, $20 with the $8 tip.) And you know what? It was worth every cent. Now I need not be ashamed in the many pictures that I will be sure to be a part of at the two weddings I will be attending this weekend. At least, I won't have to be ashamed of my hair...

a case of the mondays

Today I skipped all my classes. Probably not the best move since I'll be missing these same classes on Friday for my roommate Kirsten's wedding. Oh well. There was something about today that just called for non-conformity. It was beautiful outside and I just couldn't stand sitting in the basement of the JFSB for four hours missing it all. Granted, I spent a good portion of the day indoors anyway finally putting my spring clothes into the closet and drawers and out of the boxes that have been cluttering up my floor for the past couple weeks, but still. My room has windows. I also mailed my mother her (late) Mothers' Day gift, made my wedding gift for Brock and Kate (Cassi shirts. What? They asked for them!), and went to our ward FHE at the park... not exactly sticking it to the man, but it was fun. I met some nice new people in the ward. Maybe we will be friends for the next 2 months. Maybe longer. Who knows?

Tonight I will be going to see the Star Trek movie with Louis and Sydney. Louis was supposed to be in Chile on an internship but he missed his flight today. Ba haha. Poor kid. But I'm glad because it means we get to hang out a little more before he's gone forever. Also I will get to see Sydney who I have not seen since she moved out. And I miss her. Like the sun misses the flower.

moms of the world

Today is Mothers' Day and as such I feel that I would be ungrateful if I did not pay tribute to my mom. Her name is Heidi and she is awesome. Sometimes she comes to visit me and we do awesome things like play four square and see the movie Earth because it is Earth Day and we go to the Hari Krisna Festival of Colors on a date and it is not awkward but awesome and I love her. She listens to me when I have crazy ideas and supports me in the things are important to me. She listens to me when I talk about silly boys and when I cry about stupid things. She laughs at me when I am funny (and sometimes when I am not trying to be funny) and she gives me hugs and makes everything all better, just like moms should. I am lucky to have her as a mom.

As I'm reading this over it sounds really lame, but I guess that just goes to show you that there are somethings for which words are inadequate. Even for an English major.

i am a hippie but so is jen

Today Jen and I went to the Farmer's Market! I thought it didn't start up again until June, so I was extra excited when Jen texted me last night and asked if I wanted to go this morning. It is one of my favorite things about the summer. Today I bought a loaf of sourdough bread from Flour Girls and Dough Boys, amazing goat milk yoghurt from Drake Family Farms, and the best granola in the whole world from Bryan's wife Katie. What? Yes. The granola that I have loved since I first tasted it last summer but was then wrenched away from my taste buds when they disappeared from the Farmer's Market mid-summer was made by none other than my fabulous co-worker Bryan's wife. And probably him too. Who knows. I love them even more now than I did before. If that is possible.

Also tonight Megan and I went for a bike ride to rent Lost from Hollywood Video. We haven't ridden our bikes together since last summer and it is one of my favorite things in the whole world. Megan made me buy a bike last year so that we could bike together and I am so glad that she did. I rode Chaela's bike that she left here until June and I am in love with it. It is a real beach cruiser, not like my fake beach cruiser that has mountain bike tires, hand brakes and gears, and it is my favorite. If I knew that I would be living someplace flat, like it is here in Utah, I would buy it from her no questions asked. As it is I will most likely end up someplace mountainous where gears are a must. But we'll see how long I can resist its siren call.

Speaking of biking, Jen and I have been talking a lot about saving the environment recently (because that's what we do) and today we were saying how just doing little things like changing your light bulbs to energy-saving ones or only running your dishwasher when it's full don't really make that big of a difference in the big picture. You can't just change one thing and then continue to live your life the way you always have: you need to make a big change. One example Jen gave was walking or riding your bike everywhere within a 2 mile radius instead of driving. That'd be a pretty big change, at least for most people. I try to do my best at not driving when I don't have to, but when the whole journey to work every morning traverses 9th East and is uphill the whole way I am hesitant to make that kind of commitment. But I try to justify my driving by carpooling which is also good for the environment, right? And I do recycle, bring my own grocery bags whenever I go shopping anywhere (not just for groceries), try to walk most places, and use tupperware instead of zip lock bags whenever possible. I try not to buy food that comes with lots of extra packaging. A lot of my clothes come from thrift stores, I don't shower everyday (though that's more out of laziness than environmental reasons...) and I support local organizations like the Food Co-op and the Farmer's Market that promote local produce/products. That's a lot more than I used to do.

However, I do want to do other things too, like start my own vegetable garden, use homemade cleaning products, and start a compost heap. But some things are just hard when you're a college student and you don't really have a home of your own. Perhaps one day I'll move into a hippie commune where everyone is crazy about being green and I will realize why everyone thought I was weird. But maybe I won't. And maybe I'll love it and maybe I will have found my niche in society. Maybe. 

an epic tale of rejection and triumph

So after reading for an hour in the courtyard of the JFSB today, (with only a brief break to make a cameo appearance in some random kid's video for a usage class—"Be creative with your ellipses!!!") I was enhungered for food. J Dawg food, to be exact. And I decided that, since I'd been alone at work all morning (meaning my first meal of the day was a jamwich in my truck and lunch was yoghurt and granola in class) I didn't want to eat dinner alone. So I called a friend to come with. He couldn't. So I called another. And another. Seven phone calls/texts/gchats later I was still without a compliment to my dining duo. Really? 

So I decided to just suck it up and go on my own, something I've been trying to be less wimpy about recently. As I walked through Campus Plaza to drop off my (late) rent check, I decided that as one final attempt I would stop by my friend Autumn's apartment on the off chance that she or her roommate Rachel were home and would 1) be hungry and 2) want to come with me to J Dawgs. And... success! Autumn was home with her boyfriend Trace (I adore both of them which they know and if they didn't they do now because they are 50% of my faithful blog followers) and they fulfilled both of the aforementioned requirements! 

Autumn and Trace are one of those couples that I love. One of those couples that you see together and you think, "Of course! They are perfect together!" AND they don't make you feel like a third wheel when you're with them. I am finding that I am having more and more friends like that recently which is both awesome and slightly strange.

So the three of us walked the half a block over the J Dawgs, ordered 1 beef and 2 Polish, and ate them with relish (the adverb, not the condiment). Trace had never been before and Autumn had only been once before so it was sort of a record-making meal. Earlier Trace and Autumn had expressed a desire to go to the dollar theater tonight, so when we finished eating they called up Trace's roommate Brad and we made a double date of it. We went to see Coraline (based on a book!), which I've been wanting to see actually, and it was pretty good. It definitely wasn't as much of a kid's movie as I thought it would be, but the animation was pretty incredible and though I felt like it dragged a little bit it mostly kept my attention. Also it was scary. And there was an awkward burlesque-type scene which was, of course, completely unnecessary. 

Afterwards we went back to my house for popsicles (since we had earlier discussed where the expression "Let's blow this popsicle stand" came from since none of us has actually seen a literal popsicle stand before) and it was fantastic! I had a great time just sitting and chatting with those 3 lovely people and it was totally worth the septimal (meaning seven times) rejection I had experienced earlier. It was an evening filled with j dawgs, animation, popsicles, laughter, and friendship all around. Here here!

i live in a house with a mouse

I live in a house. A pink house. And I love it. I love it so much I once took a picture of it (see above) and made it into a postcard and sent it to my friend who is on her mission in Portugal. I was inspired by her postcard to me from the MTC of the MTC flag poles. There was a little blurb on the back with information about what their significance and stuff. Stephanie and I wrote a little blurb about the Pink House but I cannot now remember exactly what we said. Something about how it is the home of the famous Cassandra and formerly the home of the Stephanie. Also other things that were more clever.

My friend Suzanna also lives in a house. It is not pink. I also love it. She has some fantastic wall paper that I secretly and not so secretly covet. She also starred in a fantastic movie with other kids in her FHE group in which you can see her sexy self, fantastic acting skills, and beautiful aforementioned wallpaper. There is also a rather attractive male counterpart who I happened to recognize from my freshman year. What?! The world is so small.

On a completely different note, I randomly watched a trailer for this new movie $9.99 today. I want to see it very much but it is rated R for language and brief sexuality and nudity. What? It is claymation. Nobody wants to see clay figures having sex. Nobody.

So this movie is based on the short stories of Etgar Keret which I think is awesome not because I've read them (I haven't and the BYU Library's only copy of one of his many books is checked out until September. What?!) but because I am in a literature and film class right now and I just learned that about 60% of movies made are based on literature. 60%! That's a lot. It's pretty interesting to think about because movies and books are not the same at all, and we talk about that in the class—how there are certain things that are inherently literary about literature and things that are cinematic about movies that just don't cross over. That means that there are some things that books do that movies can't—they just can't. But it also means that there are things that movies can do that books can't. Think about it. It'll blow your mind.

Also I may or may not have but definitely did purchase the soundtrack for this movie today. I think it is the new soundtrack of my life.

we live in the future

If it doesn't play right away would you give it a second?! It's going to space!

cinco de mayo

Matt sent me this link about inventions and I think it's awesome.

My favorite is the dashboard toaster oven because I never have time to eat breakfast before I leave the house. Also the bicycle vest. Because people think I'm a hippie. And maybe they're a little right.

spurs

So remember when I went to Burn's Saddlery and bought a fantastic vest? Well I also bought spurs. And I recently made them into earrings. They are my new favorite. 

In addition, they also look a little bit like cogs. Awesome?

i speak in smoke signals and you answer in code

Sometimes I speak in code. Sometimes people answer back. Here is an example, taken from a gchat with my friend Dave:

me: how's business?

Dave: Good. I've sold forty already today.
How about for you?

me: very profitable.
will you be traveling to batman any time soon?

Dave: No, I don't think so.

me: that is unfortunate.
if you were to go, however, you would need to arrive in costume.
but then i suppose you couldn't arrive unless they signaled you with the bat signal in the night sky.
so you'd better wait until you're summoned.
it's very complicated.

Dave: I've been waiting. Nothing yet.

me: be patient, young one.
your day will come
also it is not night time yet so it would be hard to see the signal.

Dave: Maybe they are making the signal when it is dark in turkey, but I can't see it because I'm in the daylight.

me: that could be a problem. you might have to just go there and wait to reveal yourself until they signal you

Dave: Hang on a minute.
Okay, I just bought a plane ticket. I'm going to Turkey, so I wont' see you in class.

me: i will miss you, but i understand that you have a greater mission to fulfill. try not to forget about me as you travel across the sea.

patty

My best friend Patty is visiting! But her name is Stephanie. Sometimes she tells me about her dreams and we laugh like little school girls. Like in this picture how she is talking about a dream she had about finding a secret train and pulling a fruit roll-up out of a statue's pocket. But not necessarily and most definitely not in that order.

When she comes to visit we play our own version of Loaded Questions where we write our own questions. Tonight we played with Josh and Megan. Here are some of my favorite questions and answers: 

If Megan was a monkey, what would her favorite activity be? 

—To fling her poop at small children until they cried. Also juggling.

—Getting lots of new bras.

—Throwing her poop at everyone she didn't like because we all know that's way worse than kicking people which is what she does now.

If you could pick any celebrity to be your murderer, who would it be and how would it happen?

—Mr. T. I'd go down in the seventh round of a boxing match and then he'd pity my foolishness so hard that I'd die of shame.

–Chris Brown. He would beat me because he would think I was cheating on him. Oh wait, that's Rhianna.

—The Mighty Duck team—they would skate over myself until I was sliced into small pieces...or George of the Jungle—he would have taught me how to swing and then sabotage me and chop the vine.

If you could microwave any animal, what would it be? Why? 

—An ostrich because I'd like to see if it would fit.

—A turtle. And then I'd take his shell and wax it til it got really shiny.

—A poodle because I'd like to see it explode and see if it is as fuzzy on the inside as it is on the outside.

If Cassandra was your mom, what would be the best part about having her for a mom? 

—She would sing me to sleep and stoke my head and make me delicious food.

—How she buys a lot of hippie clothes for me.

—I am in love with her.

What a glorious evening.

yertle the turtle

Yesterday Yertle the Turtle died. Well, more accurately, yesterday we discovered a dead turtle in the duck pond and named him Yertle the Turtle. We had a very solemn ceremony for him. Though not as solemn as the one for Craig, Chaela's fish. Some small children helped lay him to rest in his grave beneath a giant oak tree while Stephanie said a few words. It was rather moving.

Also there were paper boats. Rather fitting as today is May Day. (Get it?) Donnie's triumphed over all. Especially Merrill's. That is all.